C F C/G Em
It's about all the sad stuff. Just picture a depressed onion
cutting itself.
C F C/G Em
C F
I met a homeless man named Rich
C G
Isn't that terrible?
C F
I saw a flyer for a lost dog
Am Em
And the dog didn't have any legs
C F Am G
I saw a diabetic kid trick-or-treating
C F
I saw a giraffe who had a short neck
Am G
That was sad, or a deer
E F C G
I saw an old man get hit by a train
E F
He didn't see it in the pouring rain
C G E
He didn't hear me shout, "Look out for the train!"
Because I didn't say anything.
C F C/G Em
C F C/G Em
I just thought to myself, "Ooh, this is gonna be sad."
C F C/G Em
And it was.
C F C/G Em
I'm a genius.
C F
I saw a man with only one eye
C G
In a 3D-movie
C F
I saw a little boy drop his ice cream cone
Am Em
Directly on his mother's corpse
C F
I saw a kitten stuck in a tree
Am G
Then the kitten jumped off and he hung himself
C F Am G
I saw a boy who had red hair.
E F C G
I went to a store looking for something to buy
E F
But they only sold paintings of the same sad guy
C G
No, wait--this store sells mirrors!
E
See what I did there?
C Em F Fm
Let's rock! No.
C F
I saw an old man slip and fall
Am G
Hey, what a fucking idiot
C F
I saw a woman at her daughter's funeral
Am G
Ha ha ha. Classic comedy.
C F
Everything that once was sad
Am G
Is somehow funny now
C F
The Holocaust and 9/11
Am G
That shit's funny 24/7, cuz
E F C G
Tragedy will be exclusively joked about
E F C
Because my empathy is bumming me out
G E
Goodbye, sadness
C F C/G Em C
Hello jokes.